Reaction Time

Okay, so here is one difference between mom’s and dad’s/men & women. Our reaction time is vastly different. Perfect example. We spend a day at the home of a friend with a swimming pool. For the most part the day is uneventful, kids swim & play in the pool, parents enjoy a beverage and read novels poolside, no stress, very laid back. It is a Sunday afternoon and around 5 or so I go in the house to change clothes and get ready to head home. I come back out to the pool and we are sitting around having a long goodbye, when suddenly our friend’s 2 year old falls into the pool! He had been sitting on the side playing with the hose that was adding water to the pool and merely leaned over to far and plop, in he went. He was right at the mid line of the pool where the shallow end begins to slope off to the deep end, and yes he had been told repeatedly to leave the hose alone. Reactions-we all jump up, the child’s mom starts to enter the pool from the steps at the shallow end, Pat goes on the side of the pool. Where was I? My friend said she felt this rush of air and looked up and all she saw was my feet as I dove over her head into the pool, completely dressed, watch and all. I do admit that it was important that Pat was poolside and could grab the child when I lifted him up because I could not touch the bottom, but the point is this: I didn’t even think; I just reacted to what needed to be done.

Twice now, Pat has decided to quit fishing. Both times we have been in my sister and brothers-in-law pontoon boat. The first time was the summer of 2006 and I am not sure what exactly happened, but the result was his fishing rod leapt out of his hands and into the murky, brown water of the Elk River. My sister, who was the only one in a bathing suit, immediately pulled off her t-shirt and was ready to jump in to try to find it. Pat on the other hand, is trying to make some sort of logical decision about the attempted retrieval. Last week it was the same thing. We were fishing, probably about 100 yards from where the first incident occurred and somehow, this rod too, decided to make a break for freedom and ended up on the bottom of the river. I said “Jump in!” as the boat was moving forward, but it took a couple of minutes for the reality to sink in and then Pat took off his sunglasses, shirt, shoes, hat etc…and then jumped in. Needless to say, by that time we were all a little vague about the location of where we were at the time and where the rod and reel might be. Of course he kept asking me where I thought we were when the rod & reel went in. I must look like me name is TomTom! So, I circled the area slowly for about an hour while Pat waded around in neck deep water trying to locate the rod and reel. No luck.

It is sometimes a bone of contention at our house. I don’t know how many times in the last, almost 12 years I have caught vomit in my hand (don’t feed Evan apple sauce!) or redirected to save furniture or rugs from either Evan or the dog throwing up and then clean up the mess. It has to be done, but most of the time, Pat helps by staying out of the way. And before anyone jumps on my case, let me be perfectly clear here, I am not picking on Pat, he can and does do many things that I can’t or won’t (electrical and plumbing work and cleaning up “gifts” left by the cat.) I am merely pointing out the differences in our reaction to emergency situations. Maybe it has something to do with being a mom. I tend to see danger at every turn and am prepared to react to it. Maybe it is that invisible dividing line between what he sees as his responsibilities and mine, he cleans up the outside and I get the inside, he handles Math and Science homework and I get English & Social Studies. In any event, we do try to see the humor in the situation and while Pat didn’t find any humor in it while he was searching for the rod and reel, he was able to laugh about it later. On the other hand, I rarely find myself giggling as I clean up the most recent disgorgement.